Friday, April 4, 2008

"Trista Baby" Diaper Bags: Something Smelly This Way Comes

Yes, I swore I'd never write about celebrities on my blog.
So I'm not.

I'm going to write about shalebritays. (The desired pronunciation is that of Sascha Baron Cohen persona Bruno, the German fashionista. Make that Cherman fashionisto... Anyone ever see Bruno? I think he's making a movie about Bruno...I just know the hilarious Ali G. sketch.)

So, since I must report on all things newsworthy in the world of mothering: shalebritay Trista Sutter. Does anyone remember her? How could we not? Even those of us without televisions knew a bobblehead bobble-boobed bachelorette had married some big bonehead Ken doll on television and received a lot of money for it.

Now they are "happily married," have a bouncing baby boy, and Mom's pimping out a new line of diaper bags that cost $145 apiece. Me, I think something smells a tad funky round them thar parts.

Why am I speaking in dialect?

Haven't a clue.

What was the point of this post, exactly? I don't know. I'm bored with it already. Mocking shalebritays is truly shooting fish in a barrel, innit?

Okay, so here's something very much more profound: My Dollar Store Giveaways! You who feel brave and have not yet put your name in the hat for the Dollar Store Pregnancy Test Prize Drawing, please do! I've got a preg-o test for one lucky winner. Indeed, while I have just moved both north and west, I still found time to purchase a pregnancy test from the Dollar Store of Crabtown. And your name is on it.

Because when you need to know if you're in the pink...a Dollar Store pregnancy test may help you find out. Then again, maybe it won't.

Seriously I get a kick out of the notion of buying dollar-store prego tests...even though some of you have told me they're dead accurate. Sign your name in below, gals! The competition will close at midnight three days henceforth.


Alexis said...

I LOVE Bruno! I think I liked him better than Borat even. Did you see the one where he makes that guy tell deaf children bout safe sex without using any words? Priceless.

I don't get the whole diaper bag racket. Why would I want to pay $145 for a canvas bag that is unmistakably for diapers when I could get much nicer one for the same price?

Please count this as the first entry in the prego test giveaway (why am I imagining it being the brand from Juno, "Teen Wave"?).

Blogga' said...

Hey Crabmomma, I'm a follower and long-lost friend (think sexy dance). E me at I ain't creepy despite the use of word ain't. Or despite the need for a disclaimer.

Anonymous said...

It's a giveaway and I don't care that it's a pregnancy test! Sign me up!

crabmommy said...

And the winner is....ALEXIS! Yay! Send me yr address and you shall soon have your loot!