This is what I say every time Crabtot is invited to a children's birthday party (i.e., a large festival, charitably involving everyone and their parents).
As pictured here, Crabtot is enraged because the birthday kid had received a present, and Crabtot, hopped up on cake and juice, does not understand why she couldn't snatch the present -- a lovely little doll -- and have a really long "turn" with it. (I wish I were a better techiemom and could have cropped this photo and enlarged just Tot's face and mine, but I no longer have even so much as Photoshop on my barely-hanging-on-by-a-thread computer, so...but click on pic and I think it will get bigger, the better to appreciate the facial expressions in it).
Here's an open question to people who hold large b’day parties for small people: why don’t you put Benadryl in the cake icing? Come on, it’s a special occasion. Once a year. And they would enjoy themselves so much more if they were…asleep.
My policy is not to let Crabtot attend gigs where there will be more than a scant handful of tots. This was one of the most appalling Saturdays of my momlife. After the moment pictured above, she ran out of the living room and into the hallway, then sank to her knees, and bashed her head on the (concrete) floor. Not pictured. I was not smiling.
More posting to come, when I am not sick in bed. I don’t know what is worse, being sick or trying to open the Dayquil blister-pack. (Oh, bloody hell. Now Google is going to put Dayquil ads on my blog. Got to get my meta-tagging going....)
Do post your thoughts on tot b'day extravaganzas. I haven't added my strongest opinion: no presents. Seriously, I am not trying to be Cheapmommy here (though you know I am). I am talking about the crap, the extra stuff they don't need, deserve or -- and this is the big one for me -- want, much less know how to ask for. Don't bring presents to those who don't yet know to expect them. This is obvious, no? But apparently not so obvious to all.
My policy is to bring a used book to those seeking the b'day presents for the 2-yr-old. I always buy a cool vintage book and then sort of write an explanatory note "as" Crabtot (cringe) about her mommy loving to collect used books -- and "hoping you will like this one too, even though your mommy obviously doesn't respect the environment and wants you to be a spoiled consumer receiving birthday presents from near strangers although you are only 2."
Used Curious George edition from local bookstore, hardcover, $3, so much better than new. And so much better than the Dreamlove Care Bear. Right? Did I mention $3?